


kiss and tell

by brofloskis



Category: South Park
Genre: Alcohol, Angst with a Happy Ending, Anxiety, F/M, First Time, Group chat, Internalized Homophobia, M/M, Possessive Behavior, Self-Harm, like super best friend gay, really gay
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-10-08
Updated: 2018-10-08
Packaged: 2019-07-28 08:32:55
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 5,403
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16237949
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/brofloskis/pseuds/brofloskis
Summary: through the hardships of freshmen year, nine boys from a small town work through their problems with a simple group chat.





	1. the group chat

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> kyle starts a group chat because high school sucks.

5:18 PM  
-kyle created ‘yeehaw’-  
-stan, kenny, butters, craig, tweek , clyde, and token were added to the chat-

stan: wHat?

kyle: made a gc for the boys bc boy oh boy high school is tough

kenny: it’s not that bad

kyle: iTs NoT tHaT bAd

kyle: shut up not all of us can fuck bebe

kenny: what can i say?

butters: Oh hey fellas! This is nice!

butters: I think you guys forgot to add Cartman!

kyle: no i meant to leave him out

-butters added cartman-

kyle: fuck

cartman: what’s going on?

butters: Oh! The fellas made a group chat and forgot to add you!

cartman: oh sweet

craig: fuck man

cartman: you got something to say gay boy?

craig: butters how can you even deal with him?

craig: he’s such an ass

butters: C’mon guys! He’s not that bad!

tweek: sorry, i gotta go w craig

tweek: cartman kinda is the worst

cartman: screw you gay boys

tweek: see

butters: 

butters: Yeah...

token: w how active this gc is it seems to be lacking clyde,,,

clyde: oh im here

clyde: just lurkin :^)

token: u never silently lurk??

clyde: didn’t wanna annoy people oops

token: unlike u but ok i suppose

stan: anways, whats this gc for again?

kyle: a way to stay connected while high school fucks our ass

stan: it’s not that bad

kyle: stan in the 2 months youve been in school you and wendy have broke up 3 times

stan: well she’s a bitch

kyle: if she’s a bitch why are you still with her?

stan: she’s not that bad

kenny: jesus christ 

kenny: you’re worse than i am

stan: literally it has nothing to do w you guys

kenny: jesus ok

kenny: she must have some goooood pussy

stan: omg shut up

cartman: no one wants to talk ab pussy besides u kenny

kenny: you’re just mad heidi broke up w you

cartman: fuck no im over that bitch

cartman: she had a fat pussy anyways

cartman: fat ass ugly ass headass

kenny: ‘im over her’

cartman: shut up poor boy

kenny: <3

butters: Ok fellas, it’s getting a little tense...

butters: Why don’t we plan a fun little get together?!

craig: dude id fuck w a party

craig: wait fuck we really should have a party

craig: it could be at my place

butters: Sounda fun!!

tweek: what if your house gets destroyed??

craig: babe, don’t worry. got it covered. <3

tweek: <3

token: gay

token: but im down

craig: for a party or to be gay?

token: party, dumbass

token: clyde, ur being silent again

token: we’re talking ab a party r u ok?

clyde: yeah im fine, sorry guys just spaced out

clyde: idk if id go

token: omg u always go to parties what’s wrong w this one

clyde: nothing ig

clyde: just don’t feel like going

token: ok whatever

kyle: see stan, high school is even destroying token and clyde

stan: idk what you’re talking ab

stan: and me and kyle r down

kenny: u gonna ask wendy?

stan: ig hold on

stan: she said yeah

kenny: alright, im in too

butters: This is gonna be awesome guys!

kenny: never change butters

cartman: ig ill show up

craig: u weren’t invited jackass but ok ig

craig: spread the word fuckers and bring shit to eat it’ll be friday

tweek: ill help you plan

craig: nice

token: bet, ill try to get clyde to come out

craig: alright guys, well i gtg i have a shit ton of homework

token: shit me too, bye

-private message: kyle and kenny-

kenny: hey, is stan acting weird?

kyle: fucking hell yeah

kenny: u know what his deal is?

kyle: no, but i think it’s wendy honestly

kyle: the bitch makes him crazy

kenny: god that sjw head cheerleader headass makes everyone crazy

kyle: ikr. and all stan ever talks ab is wendy fuck man

kenny: and they always suck face like everywhere like Jesus chill we get it u guys fuck

kyle: he wears this stupid cologne whenever he’s w her

kenny: u notice how he smells?

kyle: well yeah obviously

kyle: were super best friends

kenny: ha gay

kyle: were not gay.

kenny: woahh ok u alright there?  
read 5:40 PM

-private message: token and clyde-

token: hey u ok dude?

token: actin kinda weird man

clyde: oh don’t worry im just tired rn

token: oh word

token: so will u go to the party

clyde: yeah maybe ill be in the mood then

token: alright fun :)

token: couldn’t go without my best friend

clyde: yeah.


	2. the party

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> the party goes downhill really fast.

-yeehaw-

7:49 PM

kenny: it’s party time boys

cartman: im omw

kenny: ugh ok

cartman: god damn it shut up poor boy

butters: I’m excited, but is there gonna be alcohol?

craig: yes

butters: Oh boy! You guys aren’t gonna get drunk, right?

craig: actually, incorrect in my case

tweek: craig..

craig: whatever ill stay sober

tweek: :)

token: only dumbasses get drunk

clyde: well fuck i was gonna get shitfaced but

token: of corse you were

stan: fuck im gonna fucking relapse if wendy doesn’t shut up

stan: she keeps complaining ab bebe

kyle: 1. please don’t 2. bebe doesn’t even do anything what’s wendy upset ab

stan: “bebe shouldn’t have got head cheerleader, honestly your captain of the football team and we’re dating so i should be head cheerleader!”

stan: “bebe is a whore who’s fucking either kenny or clyde, probably both! bad leadership skills!”

kenny: 1. shes only fucking me 2. wendy is a shit cheerleader

stan: ok she’s a pretty good cheerleader

kenny: literally no she’s not

kenny: stan fuck dude r u really that into her pussy?

cartman: i agree w kenny rn

stan: of corse you you fatass 

stan: everyone else disagrees, right?

butters: ...

butters: She’s not the greatest...

stan: jesus christ 

stan: does anyone agree with me?

craig: dude no she sucks

tweek: yeah ngl she’s not the best..

token: she’s not very good + she’s an ass to nichole 

clyde: bebes really nice and a good cheerleader!

token: wait do u still have feelings for bebe?

clyde: noo were friends

token: ohh ok

stan: kyle, cmon

stan: u agree w me, right?

kyle: uhh this isn’t my battle

stan: omg fuck off guys

stan: gtg im here and im gonna hang out w my girlfriend

kyle: alright ig

kenny: tonights gonna be a shitshow

10:06 PM

craig: ok im taking the alcohol away

token: thank god

clyde: fuck u dude i was fine

token: literally you’re so shitfaced dude

token: fuck it im taking you home

clyde: duck u no ur not

stan: seriously fuck u criag im having a good tome

craig: you’re crying

stan: fuck u

kyle: where’s stan???

craig: literally in my room he barricaded himself in

kyle: stan, what happened?

stan: fuck u kyle u don’t care none of u care u don’t even feel the same way

kyle: ??

craig: idk either he’s pretty torn up

kyle: ill be up there.

-private message: kyle and stan-

kyle: stan, you know i care. we all care. what do you mean i don’t feel the same way?

kyle: open the door.

stan: duck u u never cares no one ever fucking cares or notices why would i tell y what i mean ill just get made fun of

kyle: stan, im serious.

kyle: ok, lets start here: who upset you?

stan: fuck off

stan: wendy

kyle: ok, what happened?

stan: she ducking broke up w me again

kyle: when?

stan: a hour ago that’s when i started drinking

kyle: fuck man

stan: um a fucking mess

stan: please come in here

kyle: i can’t you baracaded the door

stan: one alex

stan: the doors open

1:16 AM

-yeehaw-

tweek: hey guys, has everyone left the house?

token: clyde and i left awhile ago

kenny: in just left w bebe , when we left no one seemed to be there

cartman: i was only there for a hour

butters: I left once Stan got drunk.

butters: Is be ok?? I know he used to have alcohol problems.

craig: everyone responded besides kyle and stan, so i assume that’s why i cant get into my room

butters: ??

craig: soo basically stan got really drunk and he was upset ab something so he baracaded himself in my room and ik at some point kyle made it in but it looks like they either left and didn’t move the shit in front of my door or they’re still in there

butters: Oh gee! What upset Stan?

craig: literally no one knows

token: you mean you never figured it out?

craig: no, do you know?

token: nope

kenny: shit, i think ik

token: ??

kenny: wendy broke up w stan

cartman: jesus again

kenny: yup

cartman: they’ll be back together in 2 weeks

kenny: yep

butters: Oh gee that’s awful!

craig: guys...

craig: i dont think they’re getting back together

cartman: ??

cartman: why, did you make him gay?

craig: ...

craig: you know what?

craig: i geniuly think stan is so heartbroken and over this whole thing that he won’t go back

craig: i mean he got drunk, and hurt kyle, and he hates doing that

tweek: yeah

token: one can only hope it’s the end

kenny: fr

cartman: god u make it sound like kyle lives for stan

butters: Well, they’re real close!

craig: yeah

craig: yeah, they are

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ill be making a one shot called ‘the doors open’ ab what happened w kyle and stan. the story will make sense if you don’t read the story but if you want like something that shows you what happened then read.


	3. the fight

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> kyle and stan get into a fight about the big night.

10:06 AM

tweek: soo kyle and stan

token: ?

token: what about them?

kyle: ? yeah what ab us

tweek: you know exactly what im talking about kyle

kyle: fuck off

cartman: ?

kyle: you too fat boy

cartman: jesus i didn’t even say anything

kyle: you’re going to

kenny: woahh there bud

kenny: what’s going on? like it’s weirdly tense

craig: im gone for 5 min and this happens

tweek: what are you talking about :)

craig: tweek

craig: baby

craig: drop it

tweek: :(

tweek: whatever

tweek: but i expect answers broflovski

tweek: you too marsh

token: what is even

stan: literally we talked last night bc i was upset

stan: it’s not even a problem, im back w wendy

kyle: excuse me, what?

stan: im back with wendy?

kyle: so like

kyle: are you going to pretend that nothing happened?

stan: shut up kyle.

kyle: fine. sure, whatever.

-kyle left the group chat-

stan: jesus christ 

stan: i knew he’d react like that.

kenny: woahh ok lads this is getting #crazy

cartman: fuck did you do you alcoholic

stan: literally can everyone leave me alone?

stan: i did nothing

craig: stan.

craig: you don’t have to, you know

craig: be a complete ass 24/7

craig: nor do you have to be straight boy jock supreme

stan: fuck off literally you don’t even know what’s happening

craig: dumbass i was there

craig: ig you were too drunk to noticed

stan: what fucking ever you self righteous price of shit

craig: whatever

craig: im talking to kyle

stan: literally fuck off

craig: i am

tweek: hey stan?

stan: what do u want?

tweek: i just wanted to let you know

tweek: you’re acting like a real peice of shit

stan: whatever

tweek: u know what im not even gonna try this morning

stan: thank god

tweek: get help, asshat

-private message: craig and kyle-

craig: come on, you can talk to me

craig: i can tell your upset

kyle: i just.

kyle: you can’t tell anyone any of this.

craig: im constantly worried that im not enough for tweek and he just dates me out of pity

craig: you know my secret, now you can trust me with yours

kyle: jesus man

kyle: remind me to help you with that

kyle: anyways.

kyle: well

kyle: im bisexual.

craig: no offense, it’s not as shocking knowing that you and stan fucked last night

craig: still, you seem pretty straight

kyle: thank fuck

craig: ?? wdym

kyle: its stupid

craig: im here for you kyle

kyle: yeah

kyle: alright

kyle: i don’t want anyone to know

craig: no one really cares

kyle: here’s the thing, craig

kyle: maybe you have been out enough to get used to it, but i

kyle: im already the jewish kid.

kyle: i just want to be kyle.

craig: ok, i get the sentiment but,,,,

craig: there’s already 2 gay kids

craig: nothing will change kyle.

kyle: but what if it does?

craig: so, you’re gonna just hide all of high school?

craig: never tell stan, who feels the same way?

kyle: ...

kyle: what if he was just drunk?

craig: kyle

craig: guys don’t fuck each other unless there’s some feelings inside them

kyle: but he was drunk

craig: he was upset

craig: why would he be so upset ab wendy breaking up w him, think ab it

craig: this is happened so many times, yet everytime he gets upset? wouldn’t he stop caring at some point?

craig: he doesn’t even like wendy. so why would he still date her?

kyle: fuck i wish i knew

craig: ,,,

craig: kyle, with how smart u are u sure are acting dumb rn

kyle: ??

craig: wendy is stans beard.

craig: hes covering up that he’s gay and he likes you

kyle: are you sure?

craig: omg kyle yes

craig: listen.

craig: no one will care that you’re bisexual, besides maybe cartman but he doesn’t count. and stan likes you for sure. you need to confess to him and make him feel safe to come out. thats how youll get him.

kyle: do you have some kid of gay analysis device in your head?

craig: perhaps

craig: anyways, are you going to confess?

kyle: ...

kyle: alright, fine.

craig: go get em dude

kyle: thanks man

-private message: kyle and stan-

kyle: we need to talk.

stan: fuck off

kyle: no, im not here to get mad at you.

kyle: i need to confess something.

stan: alright go then

kyle: this’ll be kinda long, so be pacient

stan: alright just go

kyle: ok.

kyle: 1. i like you. as like a bf.

kyle: 2. i think you’re gay, and like me but im probably wrong. 

kyle: 3. i think wendy is your beard, and you should break up w her

kyle: 4. even if im wrong ab the gay thing, she makes you miserable. just break up w her.

kyle: 5. i really like you.

kyle: that’s all.

stan: ok.

stan: 1. holy shit.

stan: 2. when have you ever been wrong, kyle?

stan: 3. you’re right.

stan: 4. shes horrible

stan: 5. i like you a lot. please help me.

kyle: shit i was so scared dude.

stan: yeah. i was too.

kyle: so, how long have you liked me?

stan: remember when we started calling each other super best friends?

kyle: fuck, dude

kyle: that was elementary school

stan: well, i didn’t realize it was a crush until last year

stan: i thought we were super best friends

kyle: so, youre gay?

stan: yeah, ig.

kyle: it’s not bad, yknow

stan: it feels bad.

kyle: but it’s not.

stan: ig itll take some getting used to

stan: what am i going to tell wendy?

kyle: what you’re comfortable with

stan: i feel comfortable in people thinking im straight

kyle: you’re not thinking of staying with her, are you?

stan: it’s my only choice, dude.

kyle: orrr you could say you lost feelings? idkidk

stan: that’s still gonna cause shit

kyle: yeah but

kyle: nvm

stan: no what?

kyle: it’s stupid

stan: dude idc tell me

kyle: since we both like each other, maybe we could date?

kyle: we don’t have to tell anyone and you don’t even have to but

stan: that sounds nice

kyle: really?

stan: honestly?

stan: yeah.

kyle: so?

stan: ok, ill do it.

stan: but we gotta keep it a secret

kyle: welllll craig kinda sorta knows we’re talking rn

kyle: and he knows we yknow

stan: oh shit

stan: is he mad?

kyle: actually no?? he just wants us to be happy

stan: huh

stan: i thought he didn’t like me but ok

stan: ig we can craig know

stan: but then tweek will know

kyle: who would tweek tell?

stan: ur right

stan: ok let me text wendy then im coming over

kyle: alright see u then

stan: see u

-private message: stan and wendy-

stan: hey.

wendy: hey babe, what’s wrong?

stan: im sorry wendy, it’s just not gonna work.

stan: i don’t have feelings anymore. im really sorry.

wendy: excuse me, what?

stan: im sorry, it’s just not happening.

wendy: we just got back together

stan: yeah, i thought i knew what i wanted.

stan: idk what i want, i just know that we won’t work out

wendy: ohh so you don’t want me anymore

wendy: you’re making a huge mistake

stan: if i am, ill learn from it

wendy: ok whatever if you want to go ‘learn from your mistakes’ go right ahead but don’t message me ever again

stan: deal

wendy: are you fucking kidding me? deal? that’s all

stan: see, this is what has been pulling me away

wendy: omfg really? stop fucking messaging me

stan: alright

wendy: whatever.

-private message: stan and craig-

stan: just so u know, it’s official

stan: just don’t tell anyone

craig: lips are sealed, my guy

craig: comgrats

stan: thanks

1:56 PM  
-yeehaw-

token: it’s been 3 hours since the haunting messages

token: may we get an explanation?

stan: uhh me and wendy are over for good

token: great dude!

token: but what happened between u and kyle?

stan: uhhhhhh i don’t wanna talk ab it

stan: also

-stan added kyle to yeehaw-

kyle: oh shit ive been revived

token: so y’all r fine now?

kyle: yea

token: so like what even happened?

kyle: oh just a fight

kenny: ok, sorry to break the facade but ive known you guys since forever and you guys have never had a fight as weird as that

kenny: what really happened?

kyle: nothing guys, really

cartman: excuse me but SOMETHING FUCKING HAPPENED

cartman: YOU HAVE A FUCKING HICKEY, KYLE

cartman: YOURE ALSO W STAN RN I SEE YOU GUYS

stan: damn it

kyle: admitting defeat?

stan: yeah

kyle: i told you they would figure it out

stan: yeah yeah, whatever

kenny: ??

kyle: one might say we’re dating

kenny: ONE MIGHT SAY HOLY FUCK

kenny: WHEN DID THIS HAPPENSJAKAJDNSNSN

kyle: an hour ago

kyle: don’t tell anyone

cartman: ew that’s gross

kyle: you’re gross, fat ass

cartman: IM BIG BONED JEW

butters: im happy for you guys!

stan: thanks :^)

craig: i thought you guys wanted to keep it a secret

kyle: we can keep it on the dl w u guys, we don’t want the whole school to know

tweek: lucky you guys were in craigs room or else someone would have walked in on you guys

stan: shut ur up pls

token: woah woah wait

token: hickey

token: craigs room

token: did you guys hook up at the party??

token: was that why you guys were fighting??

stan: uhhhhhhHhhHhh

stan: pperhappssssss

token: holy

token: shit

kyle: don’t tell mom

stan: wait what r u gonna tell ur mom??

kyle: fuck i dunno

kenny: you probably shouldn’t

kyle: yeah you right

butters: is your mom homophobic?

kyle: yeah uhhhh idrk

butters: well gee

craig: lol yall remember 4th grade when i came out and my dad got mad??

tweek: that wasn’t funny

craig: it’s kinda funny

tweek: craig :/

craig: alright whatever

token: lol whipped

craig: clyde is whipped for u but u never say anything

token: uhhhhhHhhhHh

clyde: shut up craig no im not

craig: he lives

craig: dude u were fucked last night

clyde: oops

tweek: yeah u good bro uve been kinda funky :/

clyde: yeah im good insomnias just been kicking my ass

tweek: i have to melontonin if u need any

clyde: nahh im good thanks tho

clyde: also congrats stan and kyle wish i had what yall had

stan: it’s been 3 hours

clyde: what u guys doing rn

stan: uhhhhhhhh

kyle: holding hands and listening to xxxtentacion

clyde: see way better then any action ill ever get

stan: KYLE SNAKEJSBDNAJSN

kyle: :)

kenny: i wishhhh

clyde: who u want bro

kenny: uhhhhhHhhhshensjjsnddm

kyle: you????? being shy ab a crush????

kenny: ummmmmm he’s different

craig: now that’s what i call edgy

craig: tell us who

kenny: nnnnnnnnope

craig: hint?

kenny: perhaps

kenny: ur hint is leo

craig: tweek help

tweek: a guy who has something to do w leo

tweek: one sec

tweek: cant find anyone???

kenny: :)

craig: fuck

craig: don’t feel all smug mccormick, ill figure it out

kenny: have fun

token: why do i hang out with only gay kids?


	4. the confession

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> cartman confessing to his feelings and gets rejected.

7:36 PM  
-yeehaw-

clyde: when u emotionally insecure

stan: what?

clyde: nooothing lol

stan: was that a cry for help?

clyde: noooooooo

stan: token come talk to ur man

clyde: im not into token

stan: sure

kyle: clyde, take it from us,,,,,

kyle: ur not discreet

clyde: yknow not everything is gay

kyle: yknow your pansexual and cant hide feelings for shit

kenny: lmaoooo when did sexualities basically become horoscopes

kyle: wdym??

kenny: you know exactly what

kenny: gay guys have to be feminine and dramatic

kenny: lesbians are tomboys and independent

kenny: bisexuals are awkward and indecisive

kenny: pansexuals are CHAOS

kenny: and asexuals are shy and precious

kyle: point taken

butters: woah, what do all of those mean??

kenny: what do u all know butters?

butters: well being straight means you don’t care, gay means you like boys, and lesbian means you like girls

kyle: i don’t think

kenny: shhh

kenny: so like

kenny: what r u butters?

butters: straight obviously!

butters: i support gays and lesbians, but that’s not for me!

kenny: butters,,,,,

kenny: buttercup,,,,,

kenny: that’s not how it works,,,,,,

butters: ?

kenny: being straight means you like the opposite gender

kenny: gay/lesbian means you like the same gender

kenny: and pan/bi means you like everyone

kenny: i think your pan

butters: oh gee!

butters: looks like i sure am!

butters: woah this is weird

craig: holy shit

craig: he had his sexual awakening

tweek: iconic

butters: well gee, thanks ken! :^)

kenny: np buttercup

butters: so, im not the only not straight one, right?

kenny: oh no honey

kenny: im pan

butters: fun!!

craig: gay

tweek: gay

clyde: pan

token: straight??

clyde: ??

token: well im kinda idk

token: questioning?

stan: bicurious?

token: oh yeah

clyde: bet

stan: oh well im uhhhhhhh

stan: kinda gay,,,,,,,

kyle: babe ur fine

kyle: im bi btw

stan: shut-

stan: don’t call me babe it’s embarrassing:$/&:2@2@

kyle: fiiiiiine babe

stan: STOP

kenny: lol thank god y’all fuck now

stan: im gonna leave

kenny: also were being a bit too open where’s our fat boy coming to shut us down?

cartman: shut up i was talking to my whore mom

kenny: ahh, there he is

cartman: fuck off

cartman: anyways, kyle

kyle: god damnit

kyle: what

cartman: trust me you’ll like this news

kyle: oh no

cartman: soo im gonna keep it real i kinda got a thing for you and i think stans a dickbag and u should dump him for me

butters: wh

kenny: holy shit

kenny: woah HOLY SHIT

kenny: kyle?

kyle: haha ur joking right

cartman: actually no not at all.

cartman: dump him he’s an ass.

craig: guys i think hes fr

tweek: the the homophobic guy in the grade likes a guy? tea

token: guys this isn’t ‘tea’

token: that’s actaullt a pretty shitty thing to do cartman

cartman: fuck off u don’t know the first thing ab love

token: making someone choose between you and someone they love isn’t love 

cartman: whatever

clyde: im here for this

stan: kyle..?

stan: ur not considering, r u?

kyle: first of all, your ugly pimple face fat headass has NO chance w me at ALL, everything that comes out of your mouth is total shit. so your gonna call me an ugly jew and a fag and expect me to love you?? ok no. like stop talking seriously it’s highkey annoying. also you smell like shit. further more, you expect to to chose you over my best friend of 10 years? my bf? deadass how dumb you gotta be???

stan: oh thank god

kenny: HE SNAPPED

kenny: KYLE OMG

kenny: cartman ur ass just got BAKED

kenny: where u at??

cartman: cmon im not ugly. also looks aren’t everything. and i was just flirting!! jesus do u even know how to? you always laugh at my jokes, babe. alsoo, stans a dick and you know it.

butters: uhh guys!! let’s just get along!

cartman: fuck out of here butters

kenny: sorry u got rejected so bad, but lay off of butters.

butters: thanks ken :)

kenny: anytime buttercup :)

kyle: noo trust me you’re ugly, and ik looks aren’t everything but just kissing that,,,, no thanks sweaty. and fuck out of here ‘just flirting’ you convinced heidi for a while i was a dirty jew. and i never laugh at your jokes, and stans not a dick, you are. don’t call me babe.

kyle: also does it look like i wanna turn out like heidi did?

craig: tweek come over i feel attacked and im not even cartman

tweek: omw

cartman: i was flirting!! it’s just my weird way of doing it!! i was just playing w heidi, she’s dumb anyways. that’s why she ended up so fucked. you’re not a complete retard, so you’re gonna be more than fine, babe ;)

token: cartman, you should seriously stop

kyle: heidi is not dumb. she was manipulated by you, jackass. stop calling me babe. fuck off.

stan: im omw kyle i can feel your anger from all the way across town

cartman: fine. you win. but this is only a battle, and i will win the war.

-cartman left the chat-

kyle: fucking ab time

kyle: thanks stan :)

stan: np :)

kenny: love that for u guys

butters: kyle u ok??

kyle: yeah, thanks butters

craig: that’s a lot to unpackage

craig: so is he gay???

kenny: god who fucking knows w that freak

tweek: iconic. wild. love it.

token: clyde where u at??

craig: probably cryin

token: shit ill check on him

-private message: token and clyde-

token: clyde?

token: ik things got a little intense in the gc, u ok?

token: want me to come over?

clyde: no im fine

token: r u sure??

clyde: yeah seriously. Don’t worry ab me

token: ok,,

token: you can come to me if there’s something wrong, yknow

clyde: ok.

token: ok.

-private message: kyle to craig-

kyle: so me and stan weren’t the only ones picking up on kenny and butters right??

craig: oh no i could feel it too

craig: should we perhaps

craig: set them up?

kyle: yeah for suuure

craig: u should do it. ur closer to them

kyle: yeah ok, not rn tho bc stan fell asleep and it’s cute skekdnskdjdjnsej

craig: same w tweek. have fun on the gay bus

kyle: i am, trust me.


	5. the weed

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> kenny gets high and accidentally confesses.

7:01 PM

stan: guys i think kenny got high

kyle: ?

stan: he asked for our sex tape but i don’t think it was a joke and it was, and i quote ‘uooooooooo can I get that sex tape????????’

kyle: in all fairness, when is he not high

kenny: guys ive been reading that chat

kyle: are you high?

kenny: lmaoooooooooo yeaH

butters: kenny...

butters: i don’t like it when you do drugs...

kenny: oh shit i can hear butters sadness from here goddamnit I love him

kenny: imll stay off drugs after this im sorry

craig: woah woah woah

craig: let’s back up here

craig: you love butters? and you’re gonna stay off drugs for him?

craig: i dunno but that seems a little on the homosexual side of the spectrum

kenny: well yeah u like butters

craig: ??

kenny: oh shít haha *i like butters

kyle: WNSOJS

kyle: I HAD A WHOLE PLAN

kyle: GONE TO WASTE BC YOU HAAAAAAD TO GET HIGH

butters: i uh, heh

butters: i like you too!!

butters: do you think i could come over or something? my parents would ground me if I invited you over heh

kenny: yeah parents r in their crack run

kenny: I’ll tey and get a little sober

butters: yay!!

tweek: is this whole chat just

tweek: gay?

craig: perhaps

-private message: kenny and kyle-

kenny: I JUST CHUGGED A FUCK TON OF COFFEE AND REALIZED WHAT I DID

kyle: it was going to happen sooner or later

kenny: YEAH BUT HES COMINF TO MY HOUSE HES GONNA HATE IT

kyle: dude he’s been to ur house

kenny: ??

kyle: oh u don’t know? 

kenny: nOo what?

kyle: whenever u get really fucked up he comes n checks on u

kenny: really???

kyle: yeah!!

kenny: uhhhhhh

kenny: ok can i vent??

kyle: sure man

kenny: so i really regret telling butters bc i don’t want to fuck him up and he’s so cute and pure and im worried ill taint him bc im sooooo just like horrible and yeah

kenny: that went deep wowo

kyle: kenny shut up like seriously. butters and you are obviously different but you’re still a good person and u deserve love. i feel like u and butters can help each other and honestly ud never hurt him. he’s coming over, so go for it.

kenny: thanks ky :)

kyle: np ken

kenny: shit he’s here gtg sjdhsnbsbsbsbd

kyle: good luck soldier

-yeehaw-  
8:02

tweek: so r they together?? or nah??

token: y wouldn’t they be?? kennys been pinning for a while, and i assume butters has

stan: trust me, they have

kyle: honestly it’s been like this since like 6th grade

kenny: talking shit, i see

kenny: and ladies and gentlemen,

kenny: we did it

kyle: :)))

kenny: thanks ky

butters: don’t just say it like that kenny!!

butters: its embarrassing...

kenny: sorry buttercup but the whole school gotta know

kenny: i don’t make the rules

butters: NO!!!!

butters: my family will find out and get mad

kenny: oh yeah

kenny: well my house is musty dusty crusty but my family doesn’t care so u can crash here whenever :)

craig: wait u came out?

kenny: well there were some questions after the august 25th incident

craig: SHUT UR MOUTH AB THAT

tweek: whenever it’s brought up i feel useless lol

craig: omw babe im so sorry

tweek: it’s fine it’s over i understand

token: woAHHh what’s this man??

token: also clyde is is drama wya

clyde: lurking as usual

token: uve really been acting weird, u ok?

clyde: idk ive been off lately. im fine

token: alright.

token: anyways, the tea?

stan: yeah that’s funky

stan: also now im in the cuddling mood

kyle: ‘sleepover’ time?

stan: yeehaw

kenny: can i say?

craig: um

tweek: honesty is key, craig

craig: yeah

kenny: alright uhhh

kenny: me and craig hooked up that day

token: uhhhhHhh creek was going on

kenny: yeah it was a mistake

kenny: long story short it’s over

stan: does butters know?

kenny: yeah

stan: and?

kenny: he doesn’t care

kyle: but idk why that means u came out

kenny: we fucked at my house and my parents heard and they were confused bc they thought craig was just coming over for a sleepover

kenny: he’s really loud lol

kyle: NAMSNSNWKAJSJE

kyle: CRAIG BOTTOMED???

craig: once

kyle: that’s better

tweek: before u all call me a twink, make sure u realize butters is more of one

token: i mean

token: clyde, thoughts?

clyde: tweek twink

tweek: perish

tweek: also u sure u good?

clyde: omg yea

clyde: seriously im fine

token: okok

-private message: tweek and token-

tweek: hey, can we talk?

token: yeah what’s up?

tweek: do u really think clyde is ok?

token: ...

token: no.

tweek: yeah, me too.

token: it’s just

token: he’s a different person.

token: he used to be ignorant, but nice to listen to, always funny and happy, even if he was a bit of a crybaby

token: but now he doesn’t talk, almost as if he’s afraid.

token: he’s not even happy anymore.

token: it hurts.

tweek: aww sweetie

tweek: i think u just need to get it out of him.

tweek: once his feelings r out in the open, he’ll be back to normal

tweek: itll take a while, but u need to be there for him

token: thanks tweek :)

tweek: anytime :)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ill post a seperate one shot ab kenny and butters smamndns sowwy for the long wait uwu


End file.
